A Clean Slate

Young, beautiful, fresh. I just look at you and I think GOD. Just, find good dudes! Find good guys. Don’t find guys who have a stack of mags on top of their toilet, and watch Spike TV….If your boyfriend watches more than, like, 20 minutes of cop car chases, cut it out. And let me tell you one other secret, ladies. My new class. If he is wearing a hat, like, a baseball cap, that cap must be perfectly straight on his head. If that hat is even just one degree off this way or that way, it’s actually relative to how much of a dick he is. So if he’s totally that way, that’s how much of a dick he is. And if his hat is all the way sideways, ruuuuuun! Stay in line with the hat. And if it’s on backwards, he may want to arm wrestle. That’s my over-the-top reference. Why am I babbling so much? It’s because it leads into the next song, which is called I Don’t Trust Myself With Loving You.